Personality Disorder

Good Afternoon!

As promised, below is a list of the different types of Personality Disorders.  A person diagnosed can have only a few or a great many of these.  

If you're in a relationship with someone and it doesn't feel right, (they're controlling  verbally abusive, manipulative) you may want to read through these and see if any of them ring true to your situation.  Before my former husband was diagnosed, I had never heard of Personality Disorder.  I thought it was a polite way to say he was an angry bully.  Little did I know that it goes even deeper.  Also, it doesn't matter what gender a person is.  Both men and women have been diagnosed with Personality Disorder.  My situation just happens to be my former husband, but I know there are men going through the same thing with their wife/girlfriend in their life.

The 10 personality disorders listed in DSM-IV-TR include:

• Paranoid personality disorder . The individual affected with this disorder believes in general that people will exploit, harm, or deceive him or her, even if there is no evidence to support this belief.
• Schizoid personality disorder . The individual with this disorder seems to lack desire for intimacy or belonging in a social group, and often chooses being alone to being with others. This individual also tends not to show a full range of emotions.
• Schizotypal personality disorder . With this disorder, the affected person is uncomfortable with (and may be unable to sustain) close relationships, and also has odd behaviors and thoughts that would typically be viewed by others as eccentric, erratic, and bizarre.
• Antisocial personality disorder . Individuals with this disorder have no regard for the rights of others. Other, recent names associated with this personality type are psychopath and sociopath. Unable to base their actions on anything except their own immediate desires, persons with this disorder demonstrate a pattern of impulsive, irresponsible, thoughtless, and sometimes criminal behavior. They are often intelligent, articulate individuals with an ability to charm and manipulate others; at their most dangerous, they can become violent criminals who are particularly dangerous to society because of their ability to gain the trust of others combined with their lack of conscience or remorse.
• Borderline personality disorder . People with this disorder are unstable in their relationships, decisions, moods, and self-perceptions. These individuals are often impulsive and insecure.
• Histrionic personality disorder . The behavior of individuals of this personality type is characterized by persistent attention-seeking, exaggerated emotional displays (such as tantrums), and overreaction to trivial problems and events.
• Narcissistic personality disorder . This disorder consists primarily of an inflated sense of self-importance coupled with a lack of empathy for others. Individuals with this disorder display an exaggerated sense of their own importance and abilities and tend to fantasize about them. Such persons also have a sense of entitlement, expecting (and taking for granted) special treatment and concessions from others. Paradoxically, individuals with narcissistic personality disorder are generally very insecure and suffer from low self-esteem.
• Avoidant personality disorder . This disorder has characteristics that resemble those of social phobia , including hypersensitivity to possible rejection and the resulting social withdrawal in spite of a strong need for love and acceptance. Individuals with this disorder are inhibited and feel inadequate in social situations.
• Dependent personality disorder . Persons with dependent personality disorder are extremely passive and tend to subordinate their own needs to those of others. Due to their lack of self-confidence, they avoid asserting themselves and allow others to take responsibility for their lives.
• Obsessive-compulsive personality disorder . This disorder is characterized by a preoccupation with orderliness, perfectionism, and control.

An additional category for personality disorders exists—personality disorder not otherwise specified. This category is reserved for clinicians' use when they encounter a patient with symptoms similar to one of the above disorders, but the exact criteria for a specific disorder are not met.

Read more: Personality disorders - DSM, functioning, therapy, withdrawal, people, traits, Definition, Description http://www.minddisorders.com/Ob-Ps/Personality-disorders.html#ixzz1yBGqozTE

I just thought I would include the above information in this blog as a reference tool.  

I pray that this information blesses you in one way or another.  I believe that knowledge is power.  Arm yourselves with this knowledge and also search the web for additional information.  That's what I've been doing for the past couple of years, trying to learn more because it's so baffling to have a person treat you this way and not have any path of rational thinking.  

My therapist gave me a visual to better help me understand.  If you take both hands in front of you and put the tips of your fingers together to each hand (thumb to thumb, first finger to first finger, etc...) this represents the connections a rational person's brain makes.  Slightly pull your finger tips apart and miss touching them together by going in between your fingers and this is the 'missed' connection that an irrational person's brain has.  It can't make the connection and probably won't ever be able to.  At least for me, that was difficult to wrap my own mind around and is something I need to remind myself of on a regular basis. I just always used to think that everyone thought rationally and had common sense.  The older I get, the more I realize this isn't so.  

I always wished he would "just be nice to me".  I couldn't understand why he couldn't see the fear in the eyes of our children when he would scream and throw things.  He was in a different 'Zone'.  We learned the art of 'Walking on Eggshells'.  That's more for my next segment.

NEVER think that you CAN'T escape.  There is ALWAYS a way to get out and people who are willing to help you.  Keeping yourself and your children in a destructive relationship will only continue to hurt all involved.  If you can find a way, watch yesterday and today's episode of Dr. Phil.  At times, I'm shocked that he doesn't come out of his chair at the guy he's interviewing.  He's demoralized his girlfriend, threatened to kill her, etc.....  

YES!!  A THOUSAND TIMES YES!!! YOU CAN GET HELP!!  God gets all the glory for helping me out of my situation.  When I handed it ALL over to Him and told Him I couldn't do it anymore and that if it was His will for my kids and I to be out of that situation, He would need to make a way and HE DID!!  He will for you too!  Just trust Him!!  :)

Be blessed and be safe!

Penny